Finally, good news on global warming. In spite of extreme warnings that increasing temperatures from global warming will cause everything from drought to floods, famine to migrations, extremely hot weather to extremely cold weather, pestilence to ... well, you name it, it seems that we humans may survive this rapidly super-heating planet after all.

According to writings in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, we humans can take it. We humans adapt to temperature changes to the point that we cannot even notice that degree or so in temperature increases.

I wonder how they came to that controversial conclusion (surviving global warming, that is). Humans can actually adapt (or is that, evolve?) to a couple of degrees in temperature change.

I’ll bet I can guess how that new theory came about. One of those climate scientists from — maybe Minnesota? decided to spend a few weeks in Florida this winter. As he was strolling about, he looked around and had an epiphany. Wow, he thought. It’s 20 below zero in Saint Paul, but it’s 80 degrees above down here! That’s a temperature change of a hundred degrees! And, I’m not dying! Wow! How can that be? Humans and other creatures are supposed to become extinct if the global temperatures rise only a few more degrees.

Then, dragging his Pina Colada with him to the cool shade of a palm tree, he sat down so he wouldn’t die from heat prostration, and said to himself, Mr. Climatologist, maybe it’s actually possible for people to survive global warming. He looked about and saw a lady walking what appeared to be a very healthy little French Poodle. Another epiphany hit him! And, animals, too!

I wish he had come to me first. I could have told him that global warming of the degree they are predicting might possibly be a good thing for the human and other races of creatures on earth. After all, Eskimos (can I still call them that?) survive in places that can get to fifty below zero, or more!

Millions and millions of people survive in the equatorial areas of earth where the temperatures routinely get to ninety or a hundred degrees above zero every year. This has been going on for these people for thousands of years. Yet, they still survive and prosper. How is that possible? They should all be dead, or, in science-speak, extinct.

But no! All these species of mammals, including man (the species, not the sex) can still survive these temperature extremes. Aren’t we an adaptable bunch of creatures? Even here in the temperate zones, north and south, normal seasonal temperatures can still sometimes reach the same extremes as in the polar and equatorial zones.

Of course, man (the species, not the sex) has a slight advantage over most other species in that he can think and use abstract ideas to give him a slight mental advantage to help us in survival over some other mammals.

But, as we study other mammals, we keep finding that maybe we have evolved our thinking processes because we are actually less adaptable to change than our fellow mammalians are. Where they evolve because of outside influences on them and don’t (as yet) know how to start fires to keep warm or build an air-conditioner to keep cool, we use our super (?) minds to survive the extreme changes in our environment.

The worst thing to these scientists about this new discovery (that we can survive a couple of degrees in temperature change) is that after surviving a one degree increase in temperature change for a couple of years, we humans tend to accept the change as normal and ignore it.

I can see where this stupidity of the human race to adapt to change could frustrate the gloom and doom climatologists. After all these years of predicting disaster, it’s somewhat unnerving, not to mention frustrating, to find that no one seems to be really listening. Except politicians. Left-wing politicians, that is.

Bud Simpson writes a weekly column published in The Logan Daily News. The views of this column may not necessarily reflect that of the newspaper.

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